the 57 Moat

February 5, 2020
Fall 2006
a cutaway of a three person bunk bed by Jean Carlo Emer, courtesy Unsplash As I mentioned in prior stories, I made a number of unwanted sexual advances against my peers in an environment where they were incapable or unwilling to give consent. This story focuses on another set of incidents that happened in Fall 2006 between me and [#pr392e], a former roommate. It started when we were finishing round-up, and [#pr392e] was making lewd jokes. I took some of them too seriously, and had an uncomfortable tent in my pants. I started cycling through a series of unhealthy fantasies that would soon get me in real trouble (again).
One day, in the morning, I had finished my shower and had been putting things away in my room. At the same time, so was [#pr392e]. I proceeded to grope him. At the time, our closets did not open the same way, and I took advantage of that throughout the time that I violated him. At this time, overnight staff [#a8j44a] was nearby, trying to get another person up. I mentioned that Highpoint had a high staff-to-student ratio. At night, this was not the case, and the ratio increased to 1 staff for every five students. I took advantage of this multiple times.
If [#pr392e] raised concerns (through body language or private disclosure), it's likely that I ignored them for my own selfish benefit, as I had done in previous years. I decided to up the ante later that evening by passing inappropriate notes to [#pr392e] by stashing letters on the upper bunk where he slept. I didn't care for it then, but it seemed he was concerned about my behavior and had a heightened tone of voice of someone who was anxious. At this time, [#a9y62k] and [#a0t59k] took turns watching over my room for that evening.
The following morning was the most egregious violation I made yet toward [#pr392e]. After I had finished taking my shower, while I was putting my used clothes and hygiene supplies away, I reached out and placed my hand under his boxer briefs. I didn't regard it then, but looking back, he was terrified, and not aroused. I didn't think much of it then. Later that day, during Lunch, I was called to [#a0r54l]'s office. Though not my clinician at the time, [#a3l58e] was also there. I knew what was next but decided to put a front on anyway. [#a3l58e]: "The family came this close [👌🏻] to pressing charges on you, Eric. You need to wipe that smile off your face. DSS has been called in and they plan to do a deposition of events. You had better be truthful this time."
[#a0r54l]: "The family is really upset. Even in an environment like this, they could still cart you off to prison. You need to keep that in mind. You can't just reach out and touch people without regard to the fallout."

I decided to take their advice. As I revisit these events, I really hate what I put people through. Gosh, I was such an a******. I decided to share the names of the three staff that were in close proximity of the event as [#a0r54l] and [#a3l58e] had asked.
I later found out that the only staff member, [#a0t59k], was subject to what I remember being called "Order 57", which prevented her from working with children ever again. There are a lot of hurdles that come with employment in the United States, and I just made someone's ability to hold down work that much harder because I couldn't keep my snake in my pants. I believe that her lack of seniority may have played a role in her being the one terminated. Then again, this is pure speculation and something I cannot substantiate. It does not excuse my conduct. The following month, [#pr392e] was relocated to another room.
Like the swimming pool incident, karma came after me hard. [#pr392e] was actually very neat and always cleaned up after himself. My punishment was winding up with [#p3d91m], who was an utter slob.
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Updated 6/23/2020 Reason: Year clarification, style change